You're Gay?! Nah....

My first day in California I walked onto my Grad school's campus and saw two gay men walking in public holding hands. Coming from the midwest I knew I was home. For seven years I never hid who I was. In fact, from the moment I came out, I didn't hide or deny the fact that I was a lesbian, I just was a bit more careful. However in the bay area, there wasn't that need to be careful - hell I was living right across the bay from San Francisco! So sometimes I think Virginia wasn't quite ready for me...and I wasn't quite ready for it.

So how does one very out little lesbian figure out the right time to come out at work, friends, etc? I know many people are quite comfortable with keeping the fact that they are gay private from some people, but sometimes I don't understand it if it won't mean your job (such as military). Every day I have to hear about who such and such had a date with, who they think is cute, their baby daddies and the fact that I can't contribute about who I had a date with, who I broke up with, who I think is cute, I find quite annoying and constricting. Being a lesbian may be one part of me, but it is an important part of me and I won't shut it out. So? What do I do? Well I stamp my damn car with pride stickers!! I think that's a good ice-breaker ;)

So I pose myself with the question over and over again...am I just too gay?!

It Is What It Is

Ah, the lesbian break up. I have been through some really bad ones and thankfully one okay one. However I have reached the point where it's getting on my nerves. Women are too damn complicated and downright annoying. Why can't we just be in the moment and enjoy ourselves instead of processing every goddamn moment and analyze it? I am surrounded by wonderful loving couples that are in these fabulous relationships and dare I try to find one myself? No such luck....well yet. Dare am I hopeful? However all these experiences do teach life lessons - what we do what and don't want out of a relationship (yeah my list continues to grow....). I try to grow as a person and look beyond the pretty face....yeah someday I'll look beyond the pretty face :) In the meantime, I'm sure I will continue to keep getting a piece of my heart crushed and then move on..."it is what it is"

Hooray for California! Bout Damn Time!!

Last night was momentous. Although I was standing at work watching the news clear across the US, my heart was out for all my friends in California. Prop 8 was finally deemed unconstitutional. I spent the rest of the night remembering the past several years as I hoped for marriage equality. I remember standing in line for 14 hours at City Hall in San Francisco when they opened that small window for queer people to get married and how the mayor fought for us all. I remember all the hateful commercials...cheering along with the No on Prop 8 protesters as they stood outside my house day after day....I remember the day after the elections when they passed Prop 8 and the small group of us at work who are gay just couldn't handle being at work all met outside to just be in each others company and talk. I know none of us gave up hope.

And now my friends, all who are already married, can be legally married and have every single right as straight people. Oh sure, there may be appeals, but you can't stop us now - we WON.

Lesbians at a Cookout...

My fabulous boss invites me to her annual end of the year Pig Roast where over 200 people make an appearance. Well I love my boss, and I adore her brother which is the fabulous Drag Queen, so sure, why not go? And of course, I must take my beautiful girlfriend. Well we arrive...and what a trip :)

As soon as we arrive we make a bee line for her brother which is the only other person that I know there and we survey our surroundings....and for this California transplant I have to point out just how Southern everything was!! There was seafood cooking in giant pots, there was a giant pig roasting, tons of food in a tent, beer, beer and more beer....it was great. My girl and I wandered around and were just ourselves, but oh...we didn't realize we had attracted an audience. As we stopped talking and looked around, we had realized that even the few other gays that were there had left, the rest of the people at the party were drunk and men were staring and winking. Yep. Time for the lesbians of the party to make their grand exit.

There's nothing funnier than going to a party and watching lesbians "pounce" on the new couple in the room....oh wait...unless you're that couple :) I wonder if this actually happens to straight couples? Seriously, it was like a show, my girlfriend and I walked into the room and every other couple took their turn at us asking the same questions...like every thirty minutes - it was almost ridiculous! But did we mind? Oh no....all smiles :) But I think we could have saved a lot of giggling and time if I would have stood on a chair and made a public announcement! Luckily part of the night was saved as we talked about which couple was starting to merge! Oh no...the dreaded Lesbian Merge!!!!

The World of Drag

Drag Queens....how freaking fabulous are they? Some only have experiences with them at a show; a flash of a dollar, quick peck on the cheek....maybe you're too shy to go up to the stage - you're happy to stand in the back and admire the beauty of all. That's where I was - a happy bystander in the crowd...until I actually met one! Then the entire world of Drag Queens opened up to me....

Who knew how small my world had become....my boss was the sister of the Drag Queen....and boy did she love to gossip with me! I learned so many things, like who was getting real breasts, what she thought of the other Drag Queens, what happened when their mother saw the performance for the first time....OMG I loved this world! And the best part - I was invited to visit his closet! I almost had to sit down because all I could picture was myself in all those wonderful outfits and boa's and SHOES, oh, the shoes!!! Wow, I really don't sound like a lesbian right now :) But how many people can say that they are going to visit a Drag Queen's closet and see all the treasure's inside? It was hard enough to watch her purse one night and not take a peek! So as my girlfriend and I were watching it for her as she was making announcements for the show, we played a game of what would be in a Queen's purse.....what do YOU think would be in there?

Welcome!

After moving from the California coast to the east coast, I have discovered that queer people are quite different and I have had so much fun (and often times not) exploring these differences! I have enjoyed my California life and love my dear friends, but life is quite different here on the east coast. Women are different, I find that I am immersed with friends living the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" life, I am surrounded by Drag Queens and dating a wonderful, talented and sexy woman who on the side performs as a Drag King.....life is just too interesting to not write about!